I’m so happy at the minute, like this is odd but it’s also stupidly scary. Every time i’m happy and I feel up a height, everything crashes down. I don’t wanna feel so happy to be dropped which is why i always chose to stay unhappy because nothing can get worse, right?
Like, despite sixth form and the other aspects of my life which are bringing me down; i’m so happy lately. Maybe it is because of someone and I hate that someone can make me so happy because when they leave, they leave with my happiness too. As happy as I am, I wish i could be happy independently but also be happy with someone but right now, i’m so content being happy due to someone because I genuinely haven’t felt this okay in a long, long time.
Not only does this person make me ridiculously happy, he’s possibly the best person i’ve ever met. Like we’re so compatible and alike, it’s crazy, he’s an absolute idiot and i’m grinning like an idiot just writing this hahaha. I’m so smitten, it’s crazy.
Since breaking up with my previous boyfriend and being involved with other people since, I’ve never made a big deal out of speaking to boys and never allowed myself to feel anything for them however, this is something else. Like we haven’t met yet but it’s just different, it feels like it could be something.
I’m seeing him next week and I couldn’t be more excited.
This probably sounds naive and possibly stupid but I really had nothing else to write about and he’s the first thing which comes to my mind so yeah, if you’re reading this, I promise i’m not gay lol.